Dear Abby

Job 1:1; 2:1-10 & Mark 10:2-16

Dear Abby:
I am forty-four…and would like to meet a man any age…with no bad habits!
Signed: Kylie.

Dear Kylie:
So would I.
Signed Abby.

Most of us at some point in our life will have glanced at the dear Abby column online…in a magazine…or in a newspaper.

While Last week's Gospel passage was one that nobody chooses as their favourite… todays gospel lesson is one that no-one looks forward to preaching on.

And yet…it has been said:…there would be fewer divorces if men paid as much attention to their wives…as they do to their cars…boats …dogs…phones…and other smart devices.

The Pharisees seem to be obsessed with trapping Jesus…there were two schools of thought on interpreting the words of Moses in Deuteronomy chapter 24.

One school said that a man could divorce his wife only for adultery…the other…that a man could divorce his wife if he were displeased with her…divorce for trivial reasons was common…a man could divorce his wife but… wives were not allowed to initiate divorce proceedings…women were considered to be the property of their husbands…and had very few legal rights.

Those of us who follow rugby will have seen some players being given a yellow card as a warning for ‘off the ball activity’…for more serious skull duggery…like the coat hanger technique where a player is hooked around the neck as they run by…for this players are banished from the field…being given a red card…usually most would agree the red card was deserved.

But in the first century of the Christian era…if the husband were unhappy at all he could give his wife the equivalent of a red card…simply stating that he had divorced her…no warnings…just a red card and…it's time you went!

Because of the controversy regarding divorce…the Pharisees hope to have Jesus align himself with one side thus alienating the other…it didn't matter to them which side Jesus took…He would be in trouble with the other side…but…wouldn’t you know it… instead of taking one side or the other…Jesus went back to the Garden of Eden to establish God's intent for marriage.

In Genesis chapter 2 it was God's intent that a man and woman be joined together for life… that they would live happily in an innocent world…in a beautiful garden.

However it was not long before we had sinned…rebelled against God…found

ourselves living no longer in the Garden of Eden…now in a wilderness east of Eden.

A place characterised by weeds…rather than flowers…by dust…rather than dew…east of Eden is a place…not of innocence…rather of hardness of heart…and we are still there today… east of Eden.

There are no truths outside the gates of Eden…nothing is as God intended…east of Eden…we have locks on our doors…shops have bars on their doors and windows… walking down poorly lit streets makes us uneasy.

East of Eden…some husbands beat their wives…east of Eden…some wives emasculate their husbands.

God created us to live in Eden…but now…we live east of Eden…does this mean that we should just accept our brokenness…or should

we be asking for God's help…to become again what God created us to be.

It also means that we must learn to love one another even in our brokenness…it means we need to forgive…and to be forgiven…means that we all need to ask God's forgiveness for all the ways we have fallen short of God's intent.

The most difficult part of our Gospel lesson is…the part where Jesus talks about remarriage…where according to Mark… Jesus says…that whoever is divorced and remarries…whether male or female commits adultery.

Matthew reports the same story…with an exception…in 5:31…Matthew adds unchastity as grounds for divorce and remarriage…now by Matthew's time…the church was beginning to struggle with the reality of living east of Eden…while the church was still preaching wholeness…it was beginning to struggle with the reality of brokenness.

By Matthew's time…the church was struggling with the issue of divorce…we know that Paul in his first letter to the Church at Corinth also offered another exception…between believers and unbelievers (1 Cor 7:15; 7:39).

It seems…he to was trying to help the church cope with life east of Eden…where mankind has lived…nearly forever.

Not too many years ago at the beginning of the reality television age…the Church of England castigated/reprimanded a London television station for planning to air a game show in which couples compete to get a divorce…its critics said the planned show… D.I.V.O.R.C.E., sank to a new low…the show featured six troubled couples competing to "win" a divorce and £25,000…Producers held auditions for contestants among childless couples whose marriages were failing… interviews with friends…the in-laws…and the couples themselves were aired…producer Richard Hearsey said…’this show should be a ratings winner’…"I think they could be very vicious…I would imagine nothing will be taboo…everything could be aired."

And it gets worse…the public could text in its votes…does that sound familiar…they will decide who should get a divorce and the "winners" will be filmed going to court.

The couple will get the cash…which they split…and vacations at opposite ends of the world…the "losers" and only the losers of the competition…must go to marriage counselling! The Church of England said…”the show makes a mockery of relationships."…"Divorce should be personal and private…it is the result of things going wrong…not something you compete for."…Peter Ainsworth…a culture critic…said…"It's pretty sick…isn't it. This is taking voyeurism to new depths."

While Christians must take care not to condemn divorce more harshly than other sins…how then should the church handle divorce.

We must not ignore the fact that we have all sinned…and come short of glory of God…God's grace is our only hope…we need to remember…an intact marriage is no proof that the marriage partners are free of hardness of heart…nor does an intact marriage mean the partners are less in need of grace than others…we do not inherit the kingdom based on our own merit…those married to their original spouses…need to guard against the sin of pride.

With marriage we must encourage people to reach for the ideal of lifelong commitment… unless they are in a seriously abusive or adulterous situation.

The Church must hold up marriage to young people as something precious and holy… unfortunately…we…the church have not always done that well…we have also failed to emphasise to our young people that it is important for Christians to marry Christians… an idea which is biblically correct…but not politically correct in today’s world.

While marriage between Christians does not guarantee permanency of marriage…it does give the two people a common ground…a common vision…and a common Lord.

Let us pray.
Heavenly Father,
thank you that you love and care for us.
Help us we pray…
not to hold resentments…nor to compare ourselves with others.
We come before you with empty hands
and trusting hearts.
We pray Lord…that you would touch us again.
We acknowledge we need you more than ever in our lives.
To heal the hurts…the resentments
and to help us all to repent of our pride.
For Jesus’ sake we pray in His name.

Amen.